Saw this at eHow and it is very well thought and well written that I have to share! After all, we all want to be a cool parent, don’t we?

1. Control that you share ~ Give your child two to three choices that you can live with. Example: “Do you want to wear your blue shirt or your red shirt?” You don’t really care what color shirt your child wears and this gives them a sense of having some control.

2. Ownership of the problem ~ Determine who owns the problem. Ask these questions: Am I upset because my child’s upset? (then it’s the child’s problem) What will happen to me personally if the problem isn‘t solved? (if your answer is nothing, then it’s your child’s problem) How might I twist this problem to make it mine? (parents often twist the problem to make it their own).

3. Opportunity for thinking/decision making ~ Set limits and turn fighting words into thinking words. This will take 4 things being mastered:

a. Time ~ when training your child to think for themselves make sure you have time to follow it through.

b. Energy ~ you must have the energy to control your reactions and responses.

c. Support ~ find someone who can listen when you struggle with these steps and can encourage you.

d. Rehearsal ~ practice what you will say and how your child might react. Be prepared for them to fight you at first. This is new to them and they will test their boundaries.

4. Let empathy and consequences do the teaching ~ Find an empathy response that is yours. Give your child logical consequences to their mistakes. It doesn’t make sense to lose T.V. for staying out late. But taking phone privileges away if they are caught on the phone after 9:00 PM (or whatever your limit is) makes sense.

EXAMPLES:

Examples of training them to think: “You may eat what is served or you may wait and see if the next meal appeals to you more.” “Feel free to go out and play as soon as your room is cleaned.”

Examples of Child’s problem ~ Child’s room is a disaster area (it is only your problem when it overflows into the rest of the house).

Saw this from Litzie that she got from here as well. Read on..

There are actually 3 important aspects in making it work.

* Communication
I always think that every issue and every aspect at home should be talked about by the couple. Whether it’s about the discipline of the kids or the financial aspect of the family or even the simplest thing like what to eat for dinner. Nothing could be fixed if the couple will just keep quiet and keep there thoughts inside.

* Commitment and Common Values
Being committed to making your marriage work is one of the keys too. If you have the commitment then you will care. You would want to patch things up when something is wrong while common values let you share the same priorities with your partner. You will have to teach similar teachings to your children so there will be less arguments.

* Spirituality/Faith
I always believe that if you out God in the center of any relationship then you will be blessed. Being married means you should also be praying with him.

Have a blessed week!

I’m looking for a PS3 players card for my little boy. He’s been asking me that for a few weeks now. Good thing, I saw one at this site that has tons of different games at an affordable prices. Then I chanced up at this tips from Alpha that she saw from here. Thought this is very nice! So, I post it here as well.

1. Begin with some time in solitude.
Find a quiet place to dream. When life spirals out of control and I lose sight of what I love about life, I usually find I haven’t taken any time out for solitude. I need to get away to be alone with my thoughts and to pray.

2. Get a journal and make lists of things you used to love.
The simple process of writing things down makes a big difference for me in finding clarity of thought. Seeing the things I love on a list makes everything feel possible and doable. I love to make lists like my 20 Little Things to jumpstart my thinking.

3. Create daily and weekly rituals out of things you love.
Find ways to incorporate in to your life those things you love most. Make embracing them a regular part of living — don’t let any one or any thing stand in the way! When you take the things you love and elevate them to a daily or weekly ritual you’ll find all the more pleasure in them as you look forward to those experiences on a regular basis!

4. Slow down.
Fill your days with activities that slow you down (yes, the opposite of what we tend to do!) and allow you to appreciate and savor moments of beauty.

5. Embrace simplicity.
Life as we know it is continually filled with new and complicated things. Our phones, our computers, our calendars, our TVs, even our washer and dryer seem to require an advanced degree to be able to use them. And those are the things invented to make life better and easier! Just when we master some new electronic gadget, they crash or the new model comes out and we are frustrated again.

Move away from the complicated as often as possible and enjoy things in their simplest, purest forms. Go back to some of the rituals and pleasures your grandmother might have enjoyed, before life moved into the fast lane.

6. Live life on purpose — dare to incorporate the things you love into your life.
You can do this! Being an adult doesn’t just mean we can have dessert before dinner and stay up until 10PM. It means we can live out the things we’ve always wanted to do.

Isn’t it nice? Enjoy!